imsoshive:

me: what’s for dinner?

her: *spreads her legs*

me: 

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so, did you not cook or ….. cause popeyes closes at 10 and i need to leave now if i’m gon make it. 

bennyslegs:

watch this video, feel good little eggs,

owldude:

lacunamatata:

yes-butno:

HAM! CHEESE! mmmmmmmmMANGOES

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this is the single most intense video i’ve ever witnessed

fulbruh:

HOW TO BECOME A GODDAMN MAGICIAN

1. OWN A TABLET PEN

2. PUT IT DOWN FOR TEN SECONDS

3. ABRACADABRA WHERE THE FUCK DID IT GO

thtwhitegurrl:

slutdust:

I bought my friend an elephant for their room.

They said “Thank you.”

I said “Don’t mention it.”

Is there a joke here that 15 thousand people get but I don’t?

methtacular:

race representation in american television

mydeadthingsdiary:

hrokr:

Today I got a phone call from my Dad. He told me that something was waiting for me when I got home. It turns out that his friend had bought a pig’s head from the butchers but was too scared of it to actually touch it. The deal was that if I could open the pig up and show him how they work, he would let me have the pig. I promptly grabbed my kit and set out some newspaper to work on.

Normally when working with remains, I’m nervous for strange reasons. I struggle to touch around the mouth or put my hands inside - it’s a fear that this animal will bite me, hehe. With this pig though, I found myself excited to show somebody else why my hobby is interesting, and quickly ignored my anxieties. I think this has made me better in my craft as I’ve finally made myself believe what I’ve always known all along - the dead cannot harm you. This didn’t stop me talking to the pig though.

As promised, the remains are now mine. I’ve buried the head after removing a lot of the flesh and leaving the remains for the flies. I’ll dig it up in a few months time and see what’s going on with it. Hopefully, I’ll be able to add a pig skull to my collection and continue to teach people that animal remains are just as interesting as the living things.

:3

yungterra:

some asshole: haha u cant draw hands

me:

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jetblackrabbit:

sktagg23:

lovrdlogic:

jontronshat:

katvondeepthroat:

nerdymouse:

Yet they claim that the queer community is overly sexual and puts our sex lives out there. Straight people are weird. 

literally what the fuck

ill throw up on a baby i don’t care

You put one of these on your kid I won’t hesitate to beat you and your babies asses

Talk about indoctrination. Straight people and religious people are the masters of indoctrination.

If straight people say the “just dont shove your sexuality in my face” route then look at this and see nothing wrong with it, I swear to god….